I’ve had very memorable surf sessions lately. Maybe it’s because the water is so cold that they are frozen into my brain, but I think it’s my new board. The thing slices through cold winter waves like one of those fancy knives artfully ices a cake. It’s that, or that I know how to appreciate each fleeting moment more; the simple mundane beauty of grey water and grey sky and time to myself with both.
My mind in the day feels nearly as frozen as my body has lately. I was sick a few weeks ago in the kind of way where my mom had to be there. I could not get up, I could not make Cheerios. Although, there is maybe another reason my mind has been paused: There is a baby. The kind that makes you sick because chicken has skin, nervous to twist your back and hopeful that something so surreal is actually natural.
There is a baby the size of a lime waiting to see the world in September. When I think about where my mind has been, it’s there, focused in, focused forward, wondering where we’re going next.
Our life is all these small moments like the stones on the beach, washing around, crashing together, being misplaced, forgotten and then found again, washed off, shining in the sun.
+other things to note: the morning sickness has been bad, but not nearly as bad as it could be. I basically just feel sea sick from noon on. We might find out the baby’s gender this time, but we haven’t officially decided. We have zero names if it’s a boy. Please help!
+finally, thank you for being here reading and supporting, as always.